bush and Blair move towards a theory of peacefully considering that possible scenario leading to a ceasefire in Lebanon. One day. Concern grows as Planet Earth gets fucked up the Amazon and the UK expensive house prices force Keith Barker's into outer space. I'm mortally wounded. Here are the headlines tonight from vinny.com Tony Blair and George Bush met in private in the White House yesterday to give each other blow jobs and wiggle a finger up each other's bottoms. The meeting was described by their aides as an effort to end the Middle East crisis by mutual blanking. The two leaders unveiled a three point plan to end the war in Lebanon by cuddling each other and reading porn. It follows a 17 days of slaughter by insane religious fuckers who haven't entered the 21st century yet. On Monday, the United Nations Security Council members will meet to draw up plans for mass flanking and talking shit about stabilization forces being sent to Lebanon. A new UN resolution will be drawn up to demand a kissing and making up from both sides. The moves were greeted with widespread skepticism over whether any UN resolution can be agreed and fears that the Israelis will tell the UN to fuck off and carry on regardless. asked when He and Mr. Bush would take their fingers out of each other's asses and end the conflict. Mr. Blair told the White House press conference, the answer is as soon as possible. If we can get a room at the UN next week, then it can happen and happen then we want to do it as soon as possible but the conditions have got to be in place. President Bush said we share the same urgency I would like to end this as as quickly as possible. But having said that, I want to make sure my fingers stays up my hours and the hours of the Israeli people is tickled while we address the real problems. One Downing Street eight claimed to fingers could be out by Monday but said Tuesday or Wednesday was more realistic. Speaking before the summit, the Prime Minister's official spokesman said we need to step up the gear the international community as a whole has to pull its finger out. Meanwhile, the Israelis with their overwhelming superiority and firepower aircraft tanks and international banks, propping up capitalism all over the globe, are reluctant to stop the slaughter of innocent civilians saying one day it's the kidnapping of a couple of soldiers. Next they'll be stealing our land, forcing us into unviable ghettos, building a huge wall around us and slowly starving us to death while the world watches just like what happened in Palestine. I mean, Warsaw we're not like the Nazis you know, then just a little bit then we leading scientists all over the world are concerned about the state of the planet's largest forest, the Amazon. Since a devastating drought last year and climate change models predicting the biggest rainfall rainforest on earth will disappear in 50 years, concern has been growing and solutions have been sought. A spokesperson for the world's richest people didn't see, it's important that we don't kill many people on earth or destroy too much of the planet's natural resources. While we fuck you over for a buck. The last thing we want is to cause irrevocable damage to our business and in the planet. Nor do we want to see the workers and I mean the people of Earth that suffer too much. We need to find a solution that allows us to continue making money from the Earth's resources without humans realizing what a bunch of stupid evil Nazi fuckers we are. Nor do we want people to imagine the whole earth belongs to all life on it. And that the idea of people owning our earth is a recipe for disaster and exploitation. So we the very rich people of Earth proposed that everyone behaved themselves do as they're told go to work, pay your taxes, do not try and protect the Amazon for future generations. Do not stop business cutting it down to grow soya feed for chickens, or make cheap timber for the construction industry of Japan and China. Do not protest at the fascism of your leaders and big business as they enforce immigration controls to maintain their grip on country's labor and resources. Do not root out corruption do not become self sufficient. Do not question authority continue to work shop consume you low the landless peasant fuckers will tell you when things have gone too far get back to work or will raise interest rates and slash government spending.

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more on that story later. In the UK, house prices have risen so high that essential key workers can no longer afford to live in 90% of Britain's cities. In London a fireman would have to pay 11 times his yearly salary for a house and a nurse nine times and new initiative from the government seeks to solve the problem in an innovative way by building new houses in outer space. A spokesperson for the housing industry didn't say we must be allowed to make as much money as we can regardless of the cost to society. So even though a brick cost Same in the Outer Hebrides as in Chelsea, we want to charge millions for the one in Chelsea. And we don't care that greed and avarice are driving nurses and firemen and cleaners and other key skills into outer space. As long as we're making money after all, that's what it's all about, isn't it? The government's response to this attitude is to launch low cost housing modules into geostationary orbit about major cities. The modules will be connected via extensions to the tube and road networks. So the slaves I mean, key workers can enjoy affordable sleeping quarters close enough to the jobs to arrive on time in the mornings, while environment sent us an email of what he thought about the idea. That said, the decadent empire of the aristocracy will soon fall into the land but once again belongs to all people. We should all be free to grow our own turnips and live in the mud without exploitation. Only when the land is returned to the people. Will we be free anyway, until then, oh, nice space house would be okay. I'll bet you got a nice view. How much would the council tax be? Business News. Money is important and your life isn't sport, you will be happy to watch it. thoughtlessly. Forever. And now the weather. The planet is hotter than it's ever been with more people on it than there's ever been and agriculture is about to fail, plunging us into chaos and causing billions of deaths by starvation, famine and natural disaster. Have a nice weekend.


Transcribed by https://otter.ai