FKN Newz 2007-04-20
Top quotes
“But if the mind programmers of the CIA think we're gonna roll over and give up our guns because of it, they're sadly mistaken for raise the Lord and pass the ammunition.”
“Do you know what it's like to be young, free and single?”
“You didn't know anything Nigerians money again, did you?”
“He didn't say you don't believe that shit, do you?”
“Joe Public don't know the half of it 12 and a half billion pounds for an NHS computer system that doesn't work 50 billion pounds for new submarines that are obsolete already.”
Transcript
There's no media in a free world. Welcome to the fucking news. I'm far from normal.
Here are the headlines tonight. In America 32 people were shot dead at two locations on the Virginia Tech University campus. At least 30 of them killed by 23 year old Joe so in response to this killing spree gun owners across America didn't make the following statement. This grisly needless slaughter innocent obsession touched the hearts of all of us.
But if the mind programmers of the CIA think we're gonna roll over and give up our guns because of it, they're sadly mistaken for raise the Lord and pass the ammunition. Oh yeah, we put these comments to the heads of MK Ultra. the CIA organization responsible for hypnotizing brainwashing and programming people to kill Special Agents Twinkle Twinkle Little Star Look into my eyes you're feeling sleepy kill kill kill Hugo Chavez must die didn't say the people of America deserve better than this.
Our Nazi paymasters, I mean, average taxpayers need to know their tax dollars are being put to good use. There are no excuses for the performance of Joseph boy, why the very same day of his poor effort. 70 people were blown to pieces in Baghdad by an enthusiastic amateur on a shoestring budget, nothing more sophisticated than above. We can do better, and we're reviewing our methods in the light of this ineffective operation.
The needs to disarm the American people has never been greater with tyranny and depression just around the corner. But last thing we need is a heavily armed population of well informed well educated people opposing our fascist group and spreading dissent among the sheep. I mean, people in the aftermath of the attack photos and videos made by Joe are sent to the NBC News Network, who immediately broadcast in the interests of advertising revenue 19 public interest in his suicide video.
that killer pours out his hatred and anger saying, Do you know what it's like to have a college education to only own two handguns, one video camera and a computer? Do you know what it's like to be young, free and single? To have your whole life in front of you to live in the land of plenty to be healthy and intelligence? Do you do you?
You could have stopped this. You could have given me a Mercedes and go James and more money. But no, you will have to let me earn a living and only be lower middle class. You made me do this.
The voices over wonder what you know, as kids must can interact. There's good news about President Bush's surgeon security clamped down. It'll soon be over. Yes, that's right.
A lot of the overseen and the people of Baghdad could go back to 30 people being blown up every day and killed instead of 70. Since the clap done began, Baghdad has had more not less killing more, not less bombing, more not less reason to want American troops to get the fuck out. In a completely unrelated story, both of which hasn't restated his intention to ignore anybody calling for his resignation as chairman of the World Bank on the grounds that payment charge the fuck off.
He went on not to say I'll give my girlfriend any job I want and a bigger salary to Condoleezza Rice just so long as she sucks my corrupt corporate debt and spanked me with the hairbrush upon your somoni Oh, Mark me again. Are you naughty boy? You didn't know anything Nigerians money again, did you? When asked what kind of example he was sending them third world nations as leader of an organization supposed to root out corruption in global finance.
He didn't say you don't believe that shit, do you? Our job is to create global corruption Don't lecture me about morals you fuckers in the media just copy this down print it in your advertising rags business as normal till I say so. Okay. In the UK Police investigating the cash for honors allegations have handed out a dossier to the Crown Prosecution Service.
The head of Special Investigations will now decide how long to wait before and I'm saying no charges will be bought. It could be a matter of days, weeks, even months before the opportunity to slip the news if during some other major story comes along, so don't hold your breath. Opposition party spokesperson didn't say who cares really. We're all a bunch of corrupt pigs with our faces in the drop.
I hope the British public don't expect anything to come of this. We're all laying swindling fuckers in politics, and I don't see why one party should ruin it for all of us by putting a stop to a lucrative scam Ah, Mr. And Mrs.
Joe Public don't know the half of it 12 and a half billion pounds for an NHS computer system that doesn't work 50 billion pounds for new submarines that are obsolete already. Go back to work and pay your taxes. You sat in effectual fuckers, we've got your money and we'll do what we want to knock this off and focus back in again. Thanks and now the way your life sucks, and it's everybody else's fault.
You must make them pay a nice weekend
Themes in this episode
Analysis essay
The news context is unmistakably the Virginia Tech massacre of April 16, 2007, when Seung-Hui Cho killed 32 people before killing himself. By April 20, the story had shifted from the shootings themselves to NBC’s decision to air parts of the “multimedia manifesto” Cho mailed to the network, a choice criticized by victims’ families and mental-health experts for potentially glamorizing him. The episode also folds in the disastrous Baghdad bombings during the U.S. surge and the Paul Wolfowitz World Bank scandal, in which the Iraq War architect was under pressure over a pay-and-promotion arrangement for Shaha Riza.
Deek’s parody is unusually savage because he attacks every available script. He mocks gun owners as instantly suspecting CIA mind control and refusing disarmament; he mocks conspiracy culture with “MK Ultra” programming; he mocks NBC for converting a murderer’s self-pitying videos into ratings content; and he mocks Cho himself as a grotesque narcissist, not a profound martyr. The comparison to Baghdad is deliberately obscene: American media treats 32 deaths as civilization-shaking, while 70 Iraqi deaths are just background noise.
The recurring FKN themes are the usual triad of media hypnosis, imperial violence, and elite corruption. The CIA/MK Ultra bit connects mass shootings to state manipulation paranoia, while the “surge” segment insists that U.S. policy has increased rather than reduced death in Iraq. Wolfowitz completes the moral circle: a man tied to the Iraq disaster is now heading an anti-corruption institution while embroiled in cronyism. Deek’s point is that respectable power is more obscene than the obscenities it condemns: war criminals run banks, networks monetize murder, and the public is trained to grieve selectively.